10 Things Every Girl Knows About Shopping In Primark

Sunday, 7 August 2016

Ah, Primark. The one place you can get a Topshop replica skirt for a fiver and lose yourself in an array of £1 patterned knickers, all whilst getting up close and personal with almost every other person in the store.

It's fabulous. It's brutal. It's cheap. But we wouldn't have it any other way. Here's 10 things every girl knows from shopping in Primark.


1. It's like the Hunger Games, but worse

Hell hath no fury like a woman trying to find the last size 10 dress which isn't ripped or covered in foundation marks (utter bitches.) To survive in Primark you have to be quick and cunning. Steal those shoes when the woman turns her back for a moment, and hold them close in case someone else tries to do the same. We've all done it.


2. It's just SO CHEAP

Liquid eyeliner for a quid? Yes please. Pretty lingerie for just £4? That's going straight in my basket. Primark is literally cheaper than chips, however by the time you actually get to the till, you've amassed £200 worth of tat (and that's without scooping up some of the 'adorable' lip balms they've got in the queue.)


3. The bags are Satan incarnate

Have you ever paper cut yourself on one of those hideous paper bags Primark use? It's messy AF. We girls totally understand that they want to be eco-friendly, save the whales and all, but those vile bags which disintegrate at the merest hint of rain are as much use as a chocolate tampon


4. Primark-itis is totally a thing

When you've been in Primark too long, your tummy gets tight and you start to sweat. Is it the excitement of being in Primark? Is it the fear of being trampled? Or is it simply just wandering round a boiling store crammed with people for at least an hour? We will never know...


5. We don't need a unicorn onesie, but we want one

Actually sod that, we totally need a unicorn onesie. Wel'l just be soooo comfy and warm, until we trip on the built in feet and trip down the stairs (true story.) It's so fluffy I'm gonna die... literally.


6. Your boyfriend whines like a little bitch the entire time

They'll say they're hungry. They'll say they're tired. They'll try anything which will let them escape the vast realms of Primark ASAP. Do not let them get away with this. They are weak. Ignore their pleas and continue asking them whether they prefer the Tweetie Pie pyjamas or the Scooby Doo ones. They'll thank you one day (nah.)


7. The sizes are ridiculous

I own a size 6 'Friends' slogan t-shirt. I also own a size 14 pair of jeans. I'm not ridiculously bottom-heavy, it's just that Primark seem to have a knack of making clothing fit nothing like the size they say on the label. This is why you always have to try stuff on, which takes me to the next thing...

8. The queues are not for the faint-hearted

You queue for half an hour to try things on. You queue for another half an hour to pay. Hell, I've even queued to get in to Primark before, although it was at Christmas time (DON'T EVER GO AT CHRISTMAS OK?!) I'm pretty sure the attractions at Disneyland have shorter queue times than the Primark changing rooms. It's borderline un-godly.


9. The quality SUCKS

It's called fast-fashion for a reason - you barely wear something twice before it falls apart or shrinks in the wash, but it's totally ok because it was only from Primark. It means you can buy more. Yay!


10. It's a freaking mess

All Primark stores look like a bomb site due to the sheer number of tween girls let loose on the £3 t-shirts. Likewise the yummy-mummies knocking things off shelves with their reinforced steel prams and not bothering to pick them up. I have yet to find a Primark even half as tidy as the New Look clearance section, and that's saying something.

Despite this, we all have a soft spot for Primark and its fabulous bargains.
What do you know to be true about Primark?
29 comments on "10 Things Every Girl Knows About Shopping In Primark"
  1. All of this is so true! There is a huge primark in my nearest city and I always got lost, its like a maze in there xx
    blossomofhope.blogspot.com

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    1. There's so many different stands and racks! And why are the shoes with the men's clothes?! xx

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  2. This is so true! I literally get a headache when I spend too much time in Primark but I still end up in there every single time I go shopping haha

    https://eleaanormay.com

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    1. Primark-itis is totally real! I knew it wasn't just me! xx

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  3. I've never seen anything sum up Primark so clearly!! They've just opened a new one in my home town and it already conforms to all of these hahaha

    http://www.thehapylife.com

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    1. Hahaha I'm glad you enjoyed this post! xx

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  4. Oh I've been there with Primark! The one is Cardiff is on four floors and you actually have to *plan* time outside of your day to go in. We've been known to go for lunch beforehand so we have the energy to tackle to crowds!

    Mel ★ meleaglestone.co.uk

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    1. Oh my goodness! I've been in one with three floors, but FOUR? That's crazy! xx

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  5. This is absolutely hilarious! All of them are SO true! To be fair, I NEVER try stuff on simple because I can't be bothered to Q for an age. I am the serial returner...but only because of the bizarre sizing!!!

    https://happywiseowl.com/

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    1. Haha yay!And yes, the sizing is truly random xx

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  6. So on point! I haven't braved Primark for ages because of the queues!
    Christy xx
    StyleRarebit.com

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  7. I loved this post. I've actually fainted in Primark twice believe it or not hahaha, I'm still a sucker for those adorable cheap Disney PJ's though!

    Jen / Velvet Spring x

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    1. Oh my gosh! And I adore the pyjamas, I'm addicted! xx

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  8. haha I love this post! It's so relatable. It's definitely like hunger games in there you have to be quick on your toes if you see something you like; you got to get it on a good day too!
    Sarah x
    http://www.saraheliza.co.uk

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    1. So glad you loved this post! And I agree, sometimes its amazing, other times you wonder why you bothered going in xx

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  9. Hilarious post and so TRUE! Thankfully haven't had anything stolen from me but I always try and go in the week if I can rather than on a Saturday - did that once and massively regretted it! Itching to go to Primark now! God bless those cute pyjamas and dirt cheap hair pins!

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    1. 100 hair grips for £1? Can't go wrong! xx

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  10. Loved this post - never truer words spoken! 😂💖
    www.elliswoolley.blogspot.com

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  11. This post was hilarious and so true! Shopping in Primark is certainly an experience...how is it that there's always a massive queue for the changing room? It means that I see girls going ahead and trying a skirt on over their clothes! xx

    Sabrina Jaine

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    1. My friend once tried on a bra over her t-shirt! Desperate times call for desperate measures xx

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  12. The trick to avoiding the Primark queues is paying on the kids floor. The queues are unbelievably short!

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  13. LOVE this post! It's all so true :D xx

    www.hello-cat.blogspot.com

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  14. Your boyfriends whines like a Bitch LAWWWWWLL! Sounds right!

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  15. These are all so true, especially the sizes one. I literally never know what size to pick up!
    Alicia x
    http://bambidreaming.blogspot.co.uk

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  16. This all so true, especially the sizing! I have the same pair of jeans in three different colours and thus three different sizes! It's so annoying!xo

    www.studentpaperie.co.uk

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  17. This is all so true! I make a big thing out of going to Primark now, as in spend £150-£200 once or twice a year big thing. I can't handle the amount of people pushing and shoving and the mess drives me crazy! xx


    https://farmerswifeblog.blogspot.co.uk

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Every single comment means so much to me, thanks for making me smile! :)

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